Hey cyberspace.
Just dashing off a quick post to let you all know that I’m still alive and planning to update this ol’ blog soon. (note keyword ‘planning’) Currently in the works is a three part review of those two wacky graphic novelists Alan Moore and Frank Miller and their finest works.
In the meantime though, I’ve recently started reading ‘Skeleton Creek’ by Patrick Carman, which is quite interesting. It follows Ryan and Sarah’s investigation into the mysterious goings on at the local haunt of the same name. Maybe it is for kids. I don’t care. The thing it sets it apart from most books is that you have access to the same videos that Sarah sends to Ryan. You need to enter a series of passwords found in the book (Mostly titles of Edgar Allen Poe stories) at the Sarah Fincher web-site and ‘take part in’ the book. Maybe it is gimmicky. I don’t care. I personally happen to find it quite clever. You don’t HAVE to see the videos to read the book, but I find it helps clarify things. As the tagline says “Read it. Watch it. Live it.”
That’s about it for now. Stay tuned.
-Professor Bear.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
The Raiders of the Last Crusade of Doom. (May contain traces of Spoiler)
So I was out at the Uni Library the other day when I found a Indiana Jones dvd Box set, that is to say the three original movies and another with bonus material or something like that who really gives a fig and I was totally all like OH YEAH THIS IS EPIC, INDIANA JONES IS THA MAN and so are Spielberg and Lucas and it is all FOR THA WIN and it’s gonna be flippin’ epic to see him swinging the whip and bashing heads in again because I really liked the two movies I already saw and get to see again and I FINALLY get to watch Temple of Doom. (Breathe. Sorry about that.)
So I put TOD in the machine, pressed play, pressed pause cause I had to go to the bathroom, pressed play again, got down with the THX ‘Deepnote’ and watched the movie I have been meaning to watch for a while now. And most of the way through I was like “Wha?” It was really confusing. In fact, upon reflection, I’m still not entirely sure what the go was, obviously he went somewhere to get something and ran into someone that did such and so to him. Not that this was a terrible movie by any means, being quite creative and had some hilarious moments, but it seemed a little ….I dunno…rushed… and weird. I don’t care if the rumours are true and if there are aliens in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, surely it can’t be as strange as this movie? And this is coming from a guy who thinks Monty Python is coherent and linear…
What’s going on?
I dunno.
Was that a Big-Lipped Alligator moment?
Possibly, but I dunno.
What happened to Marion?
I dunno.
Who is this kid anyway?
I dunno.
Where are the Nazis?
I dunno.
Do these people really eat all that weird crap and is there a point to seeing it?
I dunno.
What’s with the Mortal Kombat- style heart ripping-out-of-chest-cavity?
I dunno.
How does he do that with his bare hands?
Magic.
Magic?
I mean…I dunno.
Why was that guy still alive after aforementioned Mortal Kombat- style heart ripping-out-of-chest-cavity?
I dunno.
What’s with all those peasant dudes worshiping Kali? How come they don’t just mob Indy? Come to think of it, what happened to them? Did they all just decide to take a holiday? Did Scotty beam them up?
I dunno.
Where did all the Thuggees come from?
I dunno.
Where did the Deus- Ex…er…troops come from?
I dunno.
Why does Harrison Ford look so creepy in this movie, and not just when he is possessed?
I dunno.
How many more times are we gonna repeat this gag?
I…no that’s it, moving on now.
Maybe I just need to watch it again.
Personally, while she is a babe, that Willie Nelson chick is probably the most annoying thing to ever come from the mind of George Lucas. The man who gave us Jar-Jar for crying out loud. Actually I liked Jar-Jar…not the point.
I guess I couldn’t really get the transition they made from a smart, sassy, tough (relatively-she still needs saving by Indy) lead female character to this dippy show-girl who really had less idea of what was going on than I did. Even the kid wasn’t as irritating.
Now apparently there is a rule that in Trilogies, the third film always sucks. I find that to be incorrect for the Ice Age movies and the same goes for Indy. ‘Samatter of fact, Last Crusade is definitely my favourite flick of the bunch. It ditches the kid and the moron love interest, brings back Sallah and the Nazis, Elsa is hot as and I like seeing how Indy got his awesome hat and Ophidiophobia (don’t ask me how to spell or pronounce it, I just googled it.) I’m always amused by the doddering duo of Connery and Elliot, who despite their lack of grace on the battlefield, still manage to kick a lot of derriere. Sure there is a lot less bull-whipping, but it makes up for it by using more of Williams signature Indy music and is funny as all get out.
Welp, that’s about it for now. Play me out Johnny…
Daaaaaah-da da- da, dah da daaaaaaah.
-Professor Bear.
So I put TOD in the machine, pressed play, pressed pause cause I had to go to the bathroom, pressed play again, got down with the THX ‘Deepnote’ and watched the movie I have been meaning to watch for a while now. And most of the way through I was like “Wha?” It was really confusing. In fact, upon reflection, I’m still not entirely sure what the go was, obviously he went somewhere to get something and ran into someone that did such and so to him. Not that this was a terrible movie by any means, being quite creative and had some hilarious moments, but it seemed a little ….I dunno…rushed… and weird. I don’t care if the rumours are true and if there are aliens in Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, surely it can’t be as strange as this movie? And this is coming from a guy who thinks Monty Python is coherent and linear…
What’s going on?
I dunno.
Was that a Big-Lipped Alligator moment?
Possibly, but I dunno.
What happened to Marion?
I dunno.
Who is this kid anyway?
I dunno.
Where are the Nazis?
I dunno.
Do these people really eat all that weird crap and is there a point to seeing it?
I dunno.
What’s with the Mortal Kombat- style heart ripping-out-of-chest-cavity?
I dunno.
How does he do that with his bare hands?
Magic.
Magic?
I mean…I dunno.
Why was that guy still alive after aforementioned Mortal Kombat- style heart ripping-out-of-chest-cavity?
I dunno.
What’s with all those peasant dudes worshiping Kali? How come they don’t just mob Indy? Come to think of it, what happened to them? Did they all just decide to take a holiday? Did Scotty beam them up?
I dunno.
Where did all the Thuggees come from?
I dunno.
Where did the Deus- Ex…er…troops come from?
I dunno.
Why does Harrison Ford look so creepy in this movie, and not just when he is possessed?
I dunno.
How many more times are we gonna repeat this gag?
I…no that’s it, moving on now.
Maybe I just need to watch it again.
Personally, while she is a babe, that Willie Nelson chick is probably the most annoying thing to ever come from the mind of George Lucas. The man who gave us Jar-Jar for crying out loud. Actually I liked Jar-Jar…not the point.
I guess I couldn’t really get the transition they made from a smart, sassy, tough (relatively-she still needs saving by Indy) lead female character to this dippy show-girl who really had less idea of what was going on than I did. Even the kid wasn’t as irritating.
Now apparently there is a rule that in Trilogies, the third film always sucks. I find that to be incorrect for the Ice Age movies and the same goes for Indy. ‘Samatter of fact, Last Crusade is definitely my favourite flick of the bunch. It ditches the kid and the moron love interest, brings back Sallah and the Nazis, Elsa is hot as and I like seeing how Indy got his awesome hat and Ophidiophobia (don’t ask me how to spell or pronounce it, I just googled it.) I’m always amused by the doddering duo of Connery and Elliot, who despite their lack of grace on the battlefield, still manage to kick a lot of derriere. Sure there is a lot less bull-whipping, but it makes up for it by using more of Williams signature Indy music and is funny as all get out.
Welp, that’s about it for now. Play me out Johnny…
Daaaaaah-da da- da, dah da daaaaaaah.
-Professor Bear.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Tomorrow...Today...er....Yesterday...uh...WHEN THE WAR BEGAN.
Today I learned in interesting fact. Australians, hardcore as we may be, aren’t actually bulletproof. (with the possible exception of James and Eddie out at Uni.)
How did I learn this….by being dragged to…uh… going to see Tomorrow When the War Began, a prime example of Australian film at its best. Sorry Baz.
Based on the book of the same name by John Marsden, it follows the misadventure of Frankie from the Sleepover Club, Lincoln Lewis, Wendy from the 2003 Peter Pan and some other randoms, returning from a camping trip to find their town has been overtaken by foreign hostile forces as part of an invasion on Australia (oh noes.)
Without giving too much away, here is an overview of what to expect.
“All your ladders are belong to us”
“Whoohooooo, we’re going camping!”
“No boys allowed…”
“But Daaaaad!”
“Oh Okay…I trust you.”
“OMYGOSH WE’RE IN HELL…it’s quite nice actually…and not hellish…”
“SNAKE (mushroom, mushroom)”
“HELOOOOOOOO NURSE!”
*Crashtackle*
*Neeeeeeeooooorrraaaaarrrr*
“What was that?”
“Nothing, go to sleep”
“WAAAAAH where did everybody go?”
“I’m a Doctor, and a dick…”
*bang bang bang*
“Ouch, boy that smarts.”
*VROOOOOM*
“Woa…I am so high”
“Woof Woof….dogs are funny.” (actual line)
“SMOOCHES TIEM”
*mwah mwah mwah*
“HOLY DOODIE! SHORTY’S PACKING!”
*akakakakakakakakakaka*
A THOUSAND BLOOMIN MOO COWS!
“Whoohoo”
“Oh wow, bummer!”
“MOTOBIKEZ!”
I did have one or two gripes. There a scene (you’ll know it when you see it) where the characters are totally bad-ass, but instead of having an awesome backing track (ACDC preferably), we got some other random song that completely messed up the whole vibe. And I’m not a big fan of Missy Elliot, but her song is only in the beginning bit.
Otherwise, it’s a very worthy adaption, faithful to the book, great acting and cinematography and best of all….POOP BLOWS UP…HELZ YEA! Four thumbs up, golden star, epic win… I highly recommend it.
I figured that by this point, I’d be able to but my opening statement in context for you, but I am too lazy. Just go see the movie.
-Professor Bear.
How did I learn this….by being dragged to…uh… going to see Tomorrow When the War Began, a prime example of Australian film at its best. Sorry Baz.
Based on the book of the same name by John Marsden, it follows the misadventure of Frankie from the Sleepover Club, Lincoln Lewis, Wendy from the 2003 Peter Pan and some other randoms, returning from a camping trip to find their town has been overtaken by foreign hostile forces as part of an invasion on Australia (oh noes.)
Without giving too much away, here is an overview of what to expect.
“All your ladders are belong to us”
“Whoohooooo, we’re going camping!”
“No boys allowed…”
“But Daaaaad!”
“Oh Okay…I trust you.”
“OMYGOSH WE’RE IN HELL…it’s quite nice actually…and not hellish…”
“SNAKE (mushroom, mushroom)”
“HELOOOOOOOO NURSE!”
*Crashtackle*
*Neeeeeeeooooorrraaaaarrrr*
“What was that?”
“Nothing, go to sleep”
“WAAAAAH where did everybody go?”
“I’m a Doctor, and a dick…”
*bang bang bang*
“Ouch, boy that smarts.”
*VROOOOOM*
“Woa…I am so high”
“Woof Woof….dogs are funny.” (actual line)
“SMOOCHES TIEM”
*mwah mwah mwah*
“HOLY DOODIE! SHORTY’S PACKING!”
*akakakakakakakakakaka*
A THOUSAND BLOOMIN MOO COWS!
“Whoohoo”
“Oh wow, bummer!”
“MOTOBIKEZ!”
I did have one or two gripes. There a scene (you’ll know it when you see it) where the characters are totally bad-ass, but instead of having an awesome backing track (ACDC preferably), we got some other random song that completely messed up the whole vibe. And I’m not a big fan of Missy Elliot, but her song is only in the beginning bit.
Otherwise, it’s a very worthy adaption, faithful to the book, great acting and cinematography and best of all….POOP BLOWS UP…HELZ YEA! Four thumbs up, golden star, epic win… I highly recommend it.
I figured that by this point, I’d be able to but my opening statement in context for you, but I am too lazy. Just go see the movie.
-Professor Bear.
E.R.R- a Dramatic Drama, that may or may not be medically accurate...
“Doctor, he’s…”
“Professor!”
“Right. Professor, pressure’s dropped to fifty, we’re losing him!”
“The hell we are. Charged at 350, clear!”
*zzzzzFROOMP*
“Come on, fight damn you, DO NOT DIE ON ME!”
“Still nothing Professor…and I am strangely becoming attracted to you, can we go out for lunch?”
“Dammit woman, this is no time to give in to your basic human desires. This man is dy…hey, why are you leaving? Well that’s just great. Charged at 450. Clear!”
*zzzzFROOMP*
“Well that did nothing. Ygor, come quickly, bring the electrodes!”
“The what?”
“The Sticky-Stringy-Thingies.”
“Ohhh...”
“Now we attach them like so..., NOW YGOR, PULL ZA ZVITCH!
“Yeeeeeth Mathhhter…”
*crackle crackle crackle, zzzzzzZZZZZZFROOMP*
“YES! IT IS ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE”
So, uh it looks like I’m back for the time being. I haven’t updated the blog in like, forever.
This is my attempt to revive it. Then I’ll probably make two more posts then leave it for another year. Thank-you to my one loyal reader….If you are still around.
I had something else to say, but I forgot.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go try and find that nurse…
-Professor Bear.
“Professor!”
“Right. Professor, pressure’s dropped to fifty, we’re losing him!”
“The hell we are. Charged at 350, clear!”
*zzzzzFROOMP*
“Come on, fight damn you, DO NOT DIE ON ME!”
“Still nothing Professor…and I am strangely becoming attracted to you, can we go out for lunch?”
“Dammit woman, this is no time to give in to your basic human desires. This man is dy…hey, why are you leaving? Well that’s just great. Charged at 450. Clear!”
*zzzzFROOMP*
“Well that did nothing. Ygor, come quickly, bring the electrodes!”
“The what?”
“The Sticky-Stringy-Thingies.”
“Ohhh...”
“Now we attach them like so..., NOW YGOR, PULL ZA ZVITCH!
“Yeeeeeth Mathhhter…”
*crackle crackle crackle, zzzzzzZZZZZZFROOMP*
“YES! IT IS ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE”
So, uh it looks like I’m back for the time being. I haven’t updated the blog in like, forever.
This is my attempt to revive it. Then I’ll probably make two more posts then leave it for another year. Thank-you to my one loyal reader….If you are still around.
I had something else to say, but I forgot.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go try and find that nurse…
-Professor Bear.
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